


Look Back in Anger

by Neferit



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Community: dragonage_kink, Dragon Age Kink Meme, F/M, Kink Meme, Moving On, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-18
Updated: 2015-04-23
Packaged: 2018-03-18 11:58:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3568784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neferit/pseuds/Neferit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After he walked out on Hawke, Fenris moved on to Isabela. A pity that nobody, least of all Fenris or Isabela, thought to tell Hawke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a prompt:
> 
> _Okay I read a story a while back where Fenris moved on from Hawke to Isabela and Hawke was just awful. Terribly jealous. I would like to see something very different. So after his night with Hawke Fenris moves on to Isabela but neither tell Hawke and so for three years Fenris is wearing Hawke's favor as well as his/her family crest so Hawke thinks there is still a chance for them. So fast forward three years and Hawk finds out about Isabela and Fenris. S/he is hurt and angry, even angrier when s/he finds out that this has been going on for three years. So after Danarius is taken care of Hawke confronts Fenris and Isabela. Letting them know how much they hurt him/her, it is not fact that Fenris moved on it is the fact that he didn't tell Hawke. That for three years he led Hawke on, letting him/her believe that there was a chance for them when there wasn't. Bonus: Hawke takes back the sash and Amell crest and burns it. Hawke tells them that they robbed him/her of a chance to move on by not telling him/her the truth about them. After the end game, Hawke sided with the Mages, Hawke and Anders get together and are happy._

 

It was one of those moments that Tempest felt as if time slowed down to a crawl, her eyes filling with tears, threatening to spill over the brim as she watched the scene before her. Varric by her side stopped in his tracks as well, his gaze as intent as hers.

Fenris and Isabela, her hands freely browsing the expanse of the elf’s body, and the elf… not twisting out of her reach, instead leaning into her touch, purring like a cat.

She must have made a sound, for everyone’s head snapped in her direction and then, the time continued at its usual pace - the pair jumping away from each other, Varric by her side reaching for Bianca on his back, her fingers gripping the books she brought to Fenris, wanting to offer him a bit of a pick me up gift after what transpired between him and his sister.

“You have me,” she told him back then, when he said he was alone, and the corners of his lips rose up at the statement.

What a fool she had to be to think the smile had been meant for her, when it obviously had been meant for someone else all along. 

For Isabela, who came and left as she pleased, whose favor and family crest he wasn’t wearing on his person, and who, just like him, didn’t have enough decency to tell her all her hopes are vain.

The books fell from her suddenly limp grasp to the ground, her vision blurry with unspilled tears.

They would never see her cry, she vowed to herself as she marched out of the mansion, her back painfully straight, her feet guiding her out of Kirkwall without her brain stopping them, until she found herself on the sea shore, wistfully looking south, where Ferelden lied. 

Only then she allowed herself to cry, not for the first time wishing for any of her family to be there.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something in between the big important events.

 

Nobody had been able to locate Hawke for days - not even Varric’s sources told him more than that Hawke had been last seen marching through the Hightown with so much intent in her steps that nobody dared to interrupt her.

While Varric could understand the sentiment, he certainly wasn’t very impressed by the fact that nobody had at least followed after her.

He himself had been busy back then - when Hawke,  _ Tempest _ _,_ marched out of what used to be Danarius mansion, he had been too busy giving Fenris and Isabela a piece of his mind, and he definitely wasn’t his usual friendly self.

His sources told him about the frequent visits of Isabela in Fenris’ mansion, but against all his gut feelings he sort of hoped that those visits were not of carnal nature. Of course that would come round and bite him in the ass, he thought, snorting at the irony.

And then Hawke came back, looking so calm and serene that it immediately rang an alarm in Varric’s head.

Hawke didn’t do calm and serene. Hawke did loud and brash, sarcasm and too many good intentions at times, laughter and smirks, like,  _ all the time _ \- well, apart from the time Carver left with the Grey Wardens, Broody walked out on her, and when her mother died. She would flirt lightly with him, tease Blondie, laugh over things with Daisy, teach Broody read, speak and train with Aveline and exchange innuendo with Rivaini.

Now she would look at him with wide eyes and peacefully tell him she’s fine and he would believe exactly none of it. Only once she asked him, whether he knew about Fenris and Isabela, and he couldn’t lie to her and pretend he didn’t know a thing.

It still surprised him that she didn’t throw him out of her mansion with the door being closed or launched a fireball at him when he confessed to know a thing or two - for a moment, she sure looked tempted, her eyes getting that steely glint to them that always meant that shit was about to happen. Not that time, oh no. She just looked at him with those steely eyes, closed them, and when she opened them again, there was this wide-eyed, nothing-saying expression to them.

It was actually kind of scary.

Gone was the fully outgoing Hawke they knew - instead, they got a stranger wearing her face in her place, the old Hawke only rarely breaking through, letting out a carefree laugh or cheeky smirk.

Varric couldn’t help but think it at least partially his fault for not telling her of his suspicions, especially since he knew how crushed Hawke had been after that fateful night. He helped her to cope with swamping her with work, not allowing her to dwell on it, over thinking of what she might have done wrong to sent Fenris flee. It was him who kicked Broody to pay her a visit when her mother died, the elf strangely reluctant yet willing at the same time - the visit helping Hawke mourn properly, but now Varric felt it also gave her false hopes of her chances with Fenris.

He felt like such a fool, when he looked back at those days.

It was probably no wonder that Hawke locked herself behind peace and calm and duty - duty to the city that took her in as a poor refugee and saw her ascend among nobility till she became its Champion.

Only her sheer will and determination had been keeping the situation in the city more or less stable, as she masterfully balanced the tension.

Sadly, their merry band of misfits had been anything but helpful in that endeavour - Aveline (and in connection to her Donnic as well) firmly took Hawke’s side, Merrill seemed to be confused by the whole thing, Anders showed his dislike towards Fenris even more than before (now that it was justified, no pun intended) and Fenris and Isabela had the gall to actually look like the wronged party in the whole thing.

Varric wondered what Carver would think of the whole thing.

Lately, Anders started taking refuge in the Amell estate during the templar raids on the Darktown, Hawke granting him the opportunity as soon as she heard of the danger. They had always disagreed on most of the things, but when it counted, Varric thought, both of them had their hearts at the right place.

It was strange to see the possessed apostate clean and well-fed once again, the haunted air he carried about himself for so long lessened. Both mages would spend a lot of time by researching something, or by writing one letter after another, Hawke being the author of most of the letters that left the estate, even if the replies to those letters had been of great interest to both of them. 

The whole group settled into a fragile balance - the previous group-wide friendly relayed relations becoming tense, the silences awkward instead of comfortable, as the group wandered through the Wounded Coast or the Sundermountain or the Kirkwall itself. 

And another thing changed - Fenris was finally no longer wearing the Amell crest on his waistband and the scarf Tempest would wear time to time wrapped around his wrist.

Nobody but the two of them witnessed the conversation which led to that - but afterwards, Fenris was much subdued, and Hawke indifferent, brushing Isabela’s attempts at flirting with a look that easily discouraged any further attempts.

Varric once mentioned the missing scarf and crest before Anders. The mage just looked at him, clearly surprised, before he replied. “He made it bad enough with prancing around, wearing her scarf and crest as a badge of conquest. It was time for Tempest to finally deal with it.”

Both mages disappeared from public eyes for several days shortly afterwards. When they returned, Anders looked as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders, his eyes bright and following Tempest around; gentle, calm and adoring.

Varric knew something important happened, but not even he knew the full extent of what exactly it had been, Tempest and Anders keeping their secret, responding to every querry with a small smile and a question about weather.

At least until the Fereldan King and his advisor arrived to Kirkwall, and Hawke had entirely different kind of things to worry about.


End file.
